Followers

Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Silence

I struggle to be here with you
when I know that I don't want to
I try to be present and not
flinch, from your words, words I desperately
try to capture
their essence meaningless to me now
no longer real.

With the next breath, I try to remain
within your grasp
within your words
you don't know how hard I try to escape
not your words, no, nor your apparent thoughts
outspoken I have heard too much
I can no longer tell if they're true to you

I don't know either the breath of your deception
no it's not your fault that I can't stay
that I'm trying to get away
I choke on my immobility

Alone, loneliness...they are not empty words
they spell freedom
freedom from words that have
lost their cadence
freedom from ideas
that have never been ours
freedom to be alone
without our thoughts

How I yearn for silence

31 comments:

Devika said...

Superb, Lorraine :)

in loneliness
thoughts become words
I purge them to the sky,
a blank page, gaining
silence and freedom

love,
dev

Devika said...

Acha...poets aren't so much meant to be real with words, I guess...they just fight their momentary emotions with fictitious words-- the real is too far, as truth is something we don't speak...not within our reach often,

Now let me try to understand what I said! haha :))

dev

Lorraine said...

Wow right back at 'ya Dev, I like that :)
and I
understand perfectly, it is rarely within our reach ;)
so glad you're back Dev

Devika said...

But I love words and thoughts - thats my daily bread...sometimes emotion is too far from me; especially when i am writing for money :)

thanks Lorraino :)

dev

Lorraine said...

Me too Dev, I use to write for money, but no more...although I have a few novels I could try to sell, but they need work and I have trouble with my concentration, maybe once I've deleted some long sex scenes, I'll send a manuscript for your enjoyment lol

Devika said...

haha! do you mean to say -- I wouldn't enjoy the sex scenes!? :)

anyway, sure - i would love to have that :)

dev

Lorraine said...

Not a bit my dear Dev, it's just that at the time I wrote it, I was very frustrated with everything, so each couple in my book and there were many couples had a lot of sex, and it's reallynot necessary 'cause the book is really good...I 'll send you a copy by e-mail, just know that it's not finished by any means, I would appreciate your feedback. Take your time, 'cause I know you're busy and it's a long book, I'll send you the original version, which has everything lol

Devika said...

Sure Lorraine...i will find time; and either way - original or revised - is fine...but having the original will be more appropriate from a review point of view :)

dev

Lorraine said...

I appreciate that Dev, the problem is I can't find my revised version, had it transferred from one computer to another and somehow I lost the best one...darn it...

Devika said...

anytime in any form, Lorro :)

dev

Marcel Peltier said...

" il n'y a pas de mot vide "

+

entre deux arbres
- une interrogation

+

Très beau texte. Amicalement.

Brian Miller said...

oh wow. such depth of emotion...love it when you change up the pace a bit...your long form poetry is really good...

Lorraine said...

wow j'aime beaucoup tes mops Marcel et merci beaucoup :)

It's amazing how many words it takes to talk about silence lol thanks a lot Brian, glad you enjoyed it :)

Magyar said...

No words
Fill this silent drought;
Night rain
Sates my mind with dought.

Lorraine said...

I like your silence Doug :)

Magyar said...

Should I remain silent?
__If only I could spell >doubt<... so, I guess I'd better remain... mum.
_m

Choices said...

Wow! So emotion in your words. Writing is a wonderful outlet to express how we feel. Keep writng your words,Lorraine.

Choices said...

Oops! My grammar! I meant to say, So much emotion in your words.
Have a wonderful day!

TALON said...

The last stanza is heartbreaking, Lorraine. You express loneliness so beautifully.

gautami tripathy said...

Words is what we have. Yet wordless makes sense too...

Lorraine said...

Doug, I knew what you meant :)

No worries Anne, that's exactly how I read it ;)

Thanks Talon at the time I wrote this (it's an old one) I really needed silence ;)

Guatami, the written word is silent...;)

ArleneWKW said...

The bat, about which I wrote in my blog a while ago, taught me about freedom. View the video again. Being free is about being free to be a bat or whoever or whatever you are (at the moment).

I feel glib in all this. You are struggling and I don't have the wisdom to help you. Perhaps you can learn from the bat - or your kitties.

Lorraine said...

Dear Arlene, all suggestions are good...I do love your bat video ;)

Standley said...

Que d'émotions dans ce beau poème Lorraine!

Lorraine said...

Merci beaucoup Richard ;)

Timoteo said...

An exquisite poem--and so you.

P.S. Just send me one of those sex scenes so I'll have a better idea of what you're talking about!

HI, DEVIKA!

Lorraine said...

I'm exquisite, oh shocks lol there you go you were just buttering me up....that sounds kinky, is it really that you want to know how good a writer I am, tsk tsk

Seraphine said...

i loved and hated being alone
which is rather like saying
i loved and hated myself, isn't it?

it's a beautiful poem, lorraine.
heartache and all.

Lorraine said...

Good point Cosmic girl, and thanks so much ;)

GABRIELA said...

I AM......IMPRESSED!!!!REALLY!

Lorraine said...

Wow Hi Gabriela, what a nice thing to say :)